Traditions UK : Children's Games : Conkers

Every British child knows how to play conkers. In spite of the influx of electronic games and the influence of TV and films, the ancient art of Conkers is alive and well. From September onwards children (mostly but not exclusively small boys) will huddle in corners of playgrounds and in the street, engaged in ritualised combat from which the main injuries will prove to be no worse than skinned knuckles, bruised wrists - and dented pride!

The "conker" is the ripe fruit of the Horse Chestnut tree (Aesculus hippocastanum) a tree familiar in the English countryside since it was first introduced in the 16th century. Its decorative appearance - in spring it is covered with conspicuous "candles" of white or pink flowers - was the reason for it being brought to England in the first place, but the locals soon found another use for it!

Until the arrival of the Horse Chestnut, "Conquerors" or "Conkers" had been played with hazel or cob nuts, or even snail shells, but the nut of the new tree was found to be much better for the purpose, and by the 18th century the new "conker" was firmly entrenched.

HOW TO PLAY
The game of conkers is basically very simple : two players, each with a conker threaded on a length of string, or better still, a shoelace, take it in turns to hit their opponent's conker with theirs until one conker demolishes the other. This conker is declared the winner (note - it is the CONKER which is the winner, not the player - all will become clear as the rules unfold......)

First prepare your conker
Conkers grow on trees. Big trees. True, they will eventually fall down of their own accord, but by then they will probably be over-ripe and may well have been nibbled by wildlife. As any small boy will tell you, the best conkers are those which are JUST ripe but haven't yet fallen - which means they must be made to fall! A convenient gale (common in the British Isles in the autumn) will bring down a new harvest but these will be eagerly gathered by passing children : the serious sportsman will have to collect his (or her) own. The time-honoured way involves throwing sticks up into the tree to dislodge the ripest fruit (with the necessity of having to dodge falling conkers AND the branch which was thrown up in the first place! Unfortunately, many Horse Chestnut trees have been planted along roadsides and residential avenues because of their decorative qualities so the additional hazards of traffic and irate householders have to be taken into consideration.

The fallen conker will be encased in a thick, green, spiny shell. If you are lucky it will already have started to split (showing that the conker is at its peak of ripeness,) otherwise you will have to split the shell without damaging the conker within. The ideal conker will be slightly smaller than a golf ball, beautifully shiny and a rich brown colour - chestnut brown, in fact. One one side it will have a duller patch, the scar of where it was once attached inside its shell : this is where you drill the hole.

Drill a small hole, just big enough to thread the end of a shoelace or a piece of string, right through the conker, but DON'T thread it yet. Put the conker in your trouser, shirt or skirt pocket and leave it there for at least a month. You will inevitably handle it, and the oils from your skin and the heat from your body will "cure" and dry the conker to almost iron hardness. Other ways of hardening the conker include putting it in the airing cupboard, baking it in a cool oven and even pickling it in vinegar, but these tend to produce a conker which is far more brittle than a "naturally cured" conker. Last year's conkers are ideal, if you can still remember where you put them...!
However you have hardened your conker, when you deem it to be ready, tie a large knot in one end of the string or shoelace and thread the conker on, with the "scar" side uppermost, and slide it down to the knot. You are now ready to play....

Rules of play
Conkers is strictly a two-player game, but it is also a spectator sport so large groups tend to gather. Traditionally, the challenger strikes first. His opponent has to hang his conker by the string, holding it at arm's length, whilst the challenger swings his conker, also by the end of its string, to strike the conker. The striker may steady his opponent's conker if it "accidentally" swings; if the conker is deliberately moved while the other player is taking his swing, this is definitely frowned on and the turn is taken again. The challenged then returns the strike and the contest continues, blow for blow, until one of the conkers succumbs.

Now it gets complicated. Conkers attract scores. If a conker has never been used before and succeeds in breaking another unused conker, it scores "one" and becomes a "one-er." If in its next game it breaks another new conker, it becomes a "two-er" and so on. BUT if this "two-er" is broken, its score is added to its vanquisher which, if it was previously unused, becomes a "three-er" (one for the conker it's just broken plus that conker's previous two.) If the conker that broke it had already broken others, the scores of BOTH conkers are added together and awarded to the victor, so by the end of the season (late autumn/winter, when it is finally too cold to hang around playing conkers any more...) conkers can have accumulated extensive scores and a high-scoring conker becomes a thing of value and the subject of trade, swaps and barter. The keeping of scores is a matter of honour and anyone suspected of "enhancing" their conker's score would be instantly ostracised.

Now off you go and find a Horse Chestnut tree - if you're in the USA, try looking for a Buckeye instead.....

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